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future video game movies and their chance at suckiness
http://forums.clankiller.com/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=1978		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  Satis [ Tue Sep 12, 2006 12:42 pm ]
Post subject:  future video game movies and their chance at suckiness
I was amazed at the list of games being turned into movies.

http://www.destructoid.com/some-upcomin ... movies.htm

includes:

American McGee's Alive
Far Cry
Halo
Hitman
Max Payne
Mortal Combat (!!?!? WTF?!)
Splinter Cell
Tekken (!?)
Author:  Rinox [ Tue Sep 12, 2006 2:39 pm ]
Post subject: 
American McGee's Alice and Max Payne could turn out to be really cool movies in the hands of a good director. Maybe, just maybe, Splinter Cell could be ok.

But I'll go on record here saying the others will suck so hard they'll create a vortex of suckage in every movie theater they appear. You don't want to be caught in a suckage vortex.

On a sidenote...didn't we already have like 3 MK movies?! I remember seeing one at the movies when I was 16 or something.
Author:  pevil [ Wed Sep 13, 2006 1:42 am ]
Post subject: 
yeah most movies of games suck, I don't know why they bother. Halo should be ok, simply because it was actually a novel before a game, so they should have plenty of actual story like the games have. It always amazes me though when they choose, say, Doom (which apparently is good but I've not seen it), where the basic story is "land on ship filled with alien hellspawn, and kill it". Then again its probably the perfect candidate for an Arnie-style movie ;)
Author:  Satis [ Wed Sep 13, 2006 6:47 am ]
Post subject: 
heh...I saw Doom in the theatres. I wouldn't call it good. However, I went in expecting it to totally suck and it surprised me by not TOTALLY sucking. It was decent. And the FPS part was well done.

I agree...most of those games are gonna suck. And yea, there were at least 2 mortal combat movies, both of which were total crap. I dunno if there was a third, and don't really care.
Author:  derf [ Wed Sep 13, 2006 11:32 am ]
Post subject: 
Hitman might be interesting too.

List of films derf thinks might be good:

Civilisation II
Microsoft Solitaire
The Sims
FIFA 2006
Pong
Pong 2: The Comeback
Pong 3: Revenge
Pong 4: Annihilation
Tetris
Doom (oh wait, that's been done already)
Tetris 2: Red Winter
Author:  pevil [ Wed Sep 13, 2006 1:07 pm ]
Post subject: 
I cant wait for solitaire!
Author:  Rinox [ Wed Sep 13, 2006 5:38 pm ]
Post subject: 
lol @ Red Winter.

I think a Hitman movie would invariably suck btw. The storyline is good for games, but to form a full-fledged movie plot there seem to be some open spaces that need filling. But meh, I don't know the series THAT well so nevermind me. :P
Author:  derf [ Thu Sep 14, 2006 3:04 am ]
Post subject: 
I agree. I thought it would make a film only on the basis of filling those huge holes. As for the general theme, it would have to be dark, but subtle to the fact that it is actually based on a game. The good thing is that 47 is an excellent potential leading character. His persona is mysterious, so he remains pretty much formally unaligned in terms of moral, allowing the filmwriters to mould him as they wish. Plus he's a clone, which is cool in itself.

One problem i think they may encounter is how to differentiate between The Bourne Identity. Its kinda the same thing.

As for Tetris: Red Winter, thats just a success story waiting to happen. Imagine, all is fine at the end of Tetris 1, the blocks finally made it to level 20 and we saw our unlikely hero (2-by-1) outwit his rival (2-by-2) in a tense finale. Little did they know that 4-by-1 was actually a Soviet informer. An assassination attempt is narrowly avoided on the leader of the blue blocks (to be revealed) and all hell breaks loose. All sorts of shit happens from then on. The Soviets launch an offensive consisting of wave after wave of those annoying "Zeds" (2-by-2-by-2). Not one for kids. Rated 18 in the UK, 16 in the US, but only PG in Belgium. Belgians don't fear communists. They eat them for breakfast, along with garlic waffles or whatever their goddamn national dish is.
Author:  pevil [ Thu Sep 14, 2006 7:49 am ]
Post subject: 
rofl, methinks Derf needs to switch his degree to 'Movie Hyping'. Heck, if Tetris could be that fun, I'd go watch the movie! ;)
Author:  Satis [ Thu Sep 14, 2006 12:44 pm ]
Post subject: 
you guys must be really bored. Wish I was bored. :(
Author:  Mole [ Fri Sep 15, 2006 1:53 pm ]
Post subject: 
I think Splinter Cell should be ok, so long as it's written by the same people that write the game stories, but maybe with a bit less of the old preditcable twists, and something more ... well decent!

Just incase you're wondering, no, Splinter Cell is not Tom Clancy's writing, it's based on his stories and has tie-ins with it.
Author:  derf [ Fri Sep 15, 2006 3:24 pm ]
Post subject: 
Satis wrote:
you guys must be really bored. Wish I was bored. :(


Yup. Im back at school now so ive got a little more time for my posts. Why not make them more fun? Or annoying? :D
Author:  Satis [ Sat Sep 16, 2006 9:40 am ]
Post subject: 
heh, by all means, knock yourself out. I jsut haven't had enough time to be very post productive.

How about a game based on Battlefield 1942? We'll call it....hmmm...."Saving Private Ryan". I think it'll make millions.
Author:  derf [ Sat Sep 16, 2006 10:27 am ]
Post subject: 
Yeah, i dig what youre saying. Im thinking...Matt Damon? He could be the captain of a team that goes to rescue a soldier caught deep in enemy lines...Tom Hanks can do that. We need a nerd somewhere in there too. You know, one of those guys that are unfortunately dropped into the roster but are only good at pushing pencils...Im thinking...Sizemore.
Author:  Rinox [ Sat Sep 16, 2006 3:50 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hehe..ever seen Team America?

'Matt...Damon!!"

Mattie has quite the vocabulary.
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